//Confession: I fell in love with fall.
Fall in Virginia made me feel like a kid again. It caused me to Google
at least 3 questions a day about trees. Do
leaves turn the same color every season? Why are some trees leaves more than 1
color? What causes leaves to change?... I could go on.
The autumn season here blew my Floridian brain. The concept of fall in
the past has been rolling down the windows and putting boots on anytime it is
below 77 degrees. But being Virginia in October gave me a new understanding of
the season. I hate to say it but Florida does not experience fall. There was a
stretch of three weeks where I watched entire trees go from green to bright
yellow to orange or red. Fall trees are so amazing.
I couldn’t help but think that God is the coolest artist ever. His efforts
are never half done. When you stand before a half red half yellow tree, it seems
so intentional and creative. I forget that about Him. Especially in my moments
of self-doubt. When I feel insecure and don’t fit in—in those moments I question
why. I lose sight of the beautiful tree and focus on the weird mismatching
leaves.
One morning, I sat on the porch swing and watched a huge beautiful oak
tree in the distance. It was a burgundy color at its very top and slowly faded
into a mustard yellow. I was watching
the breeze rustle through it and one by one, like butterflies, leaves floated
from the branches.
"Thank you
for making me so wonderfully complex," I thought, still staring at the leaves fluttering to the ground. The
verse was from Psalm 139, a prose about the beauty of being uniquely made by
God. In that moment I found myself grateful
for the complexities that make me who I am, that differentiate me from any
other Lauren. Talents, personalities, skills, colors—each person holding unique
and intricate differences.
After fighting for so long to understand myself and figure out why I am the way I am, I decided to fall into it.
I am thankfully complex//
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